It Takes Time To Make A Place Home!

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I came to Bangalore in 2010 as a newly-wed, all set to start a new life with my man. Though struggling with work and life, we enjoyed our times together, valued our privacy and loved our life in general. Yet, Bangalore never meant home to us. At every excuse that I had, which was almost every month, I rushed to Trivandrum, where my parents were. Every long weekend was eagerly looked forward to, to rush back to the place where I grew up and spend time there. Bangalore was a temporary arrangement, where work wanted us to be, where we wished to spend our initial years together. Nothing more. It was never meant to be one where we would settle down forever. 

We weren't locals here, we didn't know where to get the best bargain, we didn't know those nooks and corners that hide those age old shops where you get whatever you want at the best rates. We, in fact, didn't know anything about the place. We were strangers in this place, trying to fit in. We stayed here because we had to, not because we loved to. Those times when I was asked if I liked Bangalore or Trivandrum, I knew from heart what my answer was. Most of my pregnancy days were spent in Trivandrum, simply because I had my people around me, help was at finger's snap, the doctor knew me by name and more than anything, it was my comfort zone. Post baby too, we kept going to Trivandrum at every possible opportunity. Each time B's work took him outside Bangalore, we left for Kerala. I wasn't comfortable staying alone in Bangalore with Adhrith. I felt insecure to say the least. Each time Adhrith fell sick, I wanted to rush to Trivandrum because I felt at peace only with the doctor back home. Also, life revolved around just the three of us. We had friends and family scattered across Bangalore but no one that we met frequently, no one to make us feel assured about being nearby.

Soon, we shifted to a beautiful apartment near B's office. We slowly started making friends here. Friends whom we would meet daily. Friends with whom we went for mundane, household and grocery shopping. Friends who accompanied me to take Adhrith to the doctor's just because they didn't want me to go alone. Friends who made sure that I need't depend on the husband to get house-related work done. While Adhrith made friends with whom he wanted to spend every waking minute with, I got an amazing set of friends myself. We started settling down in the truest sense. We found an  amazing paediatrician nearby, to whom I rush to atleast twice a month, who, along with her staff knows Adhrith by his name, who takes an extra two minutes off her consulting time to play peekaboo with Adhrith or talk to him about spiderman or chocolates (it means a lot, especially when I am terribly worried about my baby not being well!). Once school started, while the boy made himself comfortable there, I made friends with a couple of amazing mammas there as well. 

Now, after all these years, slowly, Bangalore has started to feel like home. So much so that, last time when we went home, I was eager to come back soon that my folks back home was wondering what fell on my head, trying to figure out what was happening. This time, when B had his overseas travel scheduled for two weeks, I stood my ground stating that Adhrith and I will stay back in Bangalore. I fought with him and my mom, both of them wanting someone to come from Kerala to give us company until B was back, and I, fighting to stay alone with Adhrith alone here. For the first time in my 6 years of Bangalore life, I felt home in Bangalore. I felt secure. I knew help was right there at my doorstep with the friends I've made here who have become like family. And they proved it rightly so. Each time, we went out alone, they made it a point to check on us and ensured we reached back home safely. On those days when I was too lazy to cook, we had food brought to us. I was never made to feel that I was staying alone with my little boy. We had fun going out, roaming through the streets of Malleswaram (yes, now I've found places where I get good deals too!), doing play dates and having dinner outings. While we missed Daddy, we enjoyed our two weeks so much so that when B was back, the first thing he told me was how I seemed to have enjoyed the two weeks since I was glowing with happiness! :D

And I realised, it's not the house alone that creates a place home. It takes the people around you too. People who go out of their way to treat and make you feel like family, who makes sure you are safe and comfortable even while you are alone at home with your baby. That's when you start feeling at home. When you would rather be nowhere else, because it is here that you are at peace. And that's how Bangalore became home to me. After 6 long years!