Some Mother's Day Rambling

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My facebook wall is full of Mother’s Day updates. So is my instagram. Almost everybody on my list has a mother’s day update. And I? Even as the day is about to end, I am yet to figure out why the day is so special. It’s been 2 years - 2 years 5 months to be exact - since I became a mother. And I can’t pinpoint a single day where I’ve felt more like being a mother or the other way round. Each day has been a rollercoaster ride, with ups and downs, speeding at times and slowing down at another point, feeling scared at times yet laughing and embracing the moment at other times, but in the end, I lie down knowing that it has indeed been a joyous ride and I would do it all over again.

Since being a mother, I’ve never been able to dictate life on my terms. It just goes at its pace and I go with the flow. I can’t afford to be lazy on Sundays and curl up on the bed staying hungry because I have to feed a certain hungry tummy. I can’t have a house that looks perfect with things in its place, spick and span, because there are toys and leftovers thrown all over the place. I can’t afford to be gloomy and have mood swings because there is an innocent, little face looking eagerly at me and wanting to see me smile. Each day requires extra effort and yet, as the day comes to an end, I still have a content smile on my face. And that assures me why I look forward to the chaos the next day. That tells me why the day that just passed by is Mother’s Day just like all the other days.

Since motherhood embraced me, I’ve celebrated one person in my life daily – my mother. Not because I know what she went through as a mother or not because I can relate to her motherhood struggles but because, she is the one who has stood by me like a rock ever since I got pregnant. She is the one who selflessly took care of me like a baby while the rest of the world started looking at me like a mother. She is the only one who understood my mood swings, tantrums and still accommodated me even while I was at my worst with her. She is the only one who offers to take care of the little one while I take a break because she knows I need a break badly even more than the fact that she would get to spend time with my baby. Yes, I truly value her a lot more after I became a mother. Because, there have been times where, without her, I simply wouldn’t have been able to push through and past. If it wasn’t for her, I might not be able to enjoy motherhood as I do now. And I will forever be grateful to her, not just one day in a year but every single second. And to celebrate her, I don’t need a specific day. I really don’t. Because, I celebrate her in every breathe that I take.

But yes, if still a particular day needs to be kept aside to celebrate moms, I would really love to take a break that day. No, not a physical break, but a break from being judged as a mother, a break from being watched over by eyes trying to find where I falter as a mom or a break from being tsk-tsked in general. And that day, I will smile without holding back and wish you a very happy Mother’s Day. Until then, I will treat every day as Mother’s Day and carry on with my motherhood duties.